I was talking with one my leaders at church the other day about why we want to move away from traditional accountability groups specifically for our men (though we are doing the same for our women). We are moving to a gospel-centered Fight Club model instead.
Why?
Because in a street fight, the gospel-centered Fight Club will beat the traditional Accountability Group into submission every time. It is just better and more effective. Why?
First – accountability groups tend to be single-issue focused. Guys join accountability groups to help them because they look at porn or they spend too much money or they have problems controling their temper. The result is a group of guys who are all struggling (and failing) with the same thing in the same ways. This causes the guys involved to start looking at their struggle as an isolated unhealthy behavior instead of as a manefestation of a deeper heart issue.
Gospel-centered Fight Clubs, on the other hand, pool guys together as sinners who need to fight for holiness. One guy’s sin might be porn. Another guy’s sin might be laziness. Another guy might be struggling with cowardice in the work place. But there is a recognition that while our individual struggles might be different, the underlying cause of those struggles is not. We are each struggling to believe the gospel in a way that sets us free as God’s men.
Second – accountability groups focus on the sin instead of the sin under the sin. Since these groups are centered around a single problem behavior, they tend to become focused on behavior modification instead of on heart transformation. Success is measured in terms of eliminating (or reducing) the problem behavior.
Gospel-Centered Fight Clubs, though, aren’t about simply eliminating a behavior. They are about fighting for an inner transformation in line with holiness. Fight Clubs recognize it isn’t enough to simply stop looking at porn – we need to dig deeper to find out why a person is looking at it in the first place – and then finding out how the gospel speaks to that deeper need. The goal of the Fight Club is gospel transformation that leads to true freedom, not just the elmination of specific behaviors.
Third – accountability groups are notorious for being derailed by passivity, shame, and an unspoken agreement not to dig too deep. This doesn’t happen to every group, but it happens to a lot of them. Since everyone in the group is strugging with a similar problem behavior, the people involved can sometimes fall into a lack of engagement because of personal guilt. There comes to be an unspoken agreement: I won’t push too hard on this area for you – so don’t you do it for me.
Gsopel-Centered Fight Clubs, on the other hand, are less prone to this kind of derailment. Since the partcipants are dealing with different surface sins, there is less inclination to create a space for mutual hiding. Also, the goal is clearly stated as heart transformation, not just behavior elimination – so even if the behavior is “under control,” the group will cotinue pushing each other to a mature gospel identity.
Lastly – accountability groups, even when successful, tend to show limited long-term success. Just because a behavior is brought under control doesn’t mean the underlying issue that caused it will not either cause other problems or cause the problem behavior to return. We could catalogue countless stories of guys who went through a group, found a measure of freedom, only to fall back into the same sin patterns (often, even worse).
Gospel-Centered Fight Clubs have a greater potential to have sticking power in a person’s life because the goal is not behavior modificaiton – its character transformation. A person who learns how to identify the sin under the sin gets adept at real repentance. A person who experiences how the gospel addresses their heart cries for security, acceptance, comfort and influence will also experience genuine freedom from their sinful compensating behaviors.
Because in a street fight, the gospel-centered Fight Club will beat the traditional Accountability Group into submission every time. It is just better and more effective. Why?
First – accountability groups tend to be single-issue focused. Guys join accountability groups to help them because they look at porn or they spend too much money or they have problems controling their temper. The result is a group of guys who are all struggling (and failing) with the same thing in the same ways. This causes the guys involved to start looking at their struggle as an isolated unhealthy behavior instead of as a manefestation of a deeper heart issue.
Gospel-centered Fight Clubs, on the other hand, pool guys together as sinners who need to fight for holiness. One guy’s sin might be porn. Another guy’s sin might be laziness. Another guy might be struggling with cowardice in the work place. But there is a recognition that while our individual struggles might be different, the underlying cause of those struggles is not. We are each struggling to believe the gospel in a way that sets us free as God’s men.
Second – accountability groups focus on the sin instead of the sin under the sin. Since these groups are centered around a single problem behavior, they tend to become focused on behavior modification instead of on heart transformation. Success is measured in terms of eliminating (or reducing) the problem behavior.
Gospel-Centered Fight Clubs, though, aren’t about simply eliminating a behavior. They are about fighting for an inner transformation in line with holiness. Fight Clubs recognize it isn’t enough to simply stop looking at porn – we need to dig deeper to find out why a person is looking at it in the first place – and then finding out how the gospel speaks to that deeper need. The goal of the Fight Club is gospel transformation that leads to true freedom, not just the elmination of specific behaviors.
Third – accountability groups are notorious for being derailed by passivity, shame, and an unspoken agreement not to dig too deep. This doesn’t happen to every group, but it happens to a lot of them. Since everyone in the group is strugging with a similar problem behavior, the people involved can sometimes fall into a lack of engagement because of personal guilt. There comes to be an unspoken agreement: I won’t push too hard on this area for you – so don’t you do it for me.
Gsopel-Centered Fight Clubs, on the other hand, are less prone to this kind of derailment. Since the partcipants are dealing with different surface sins, there is less inclination to create a space for mutual hiding. Also, the goal is clearly stated as heart transformation, not just behavior elimination – so even if the behavior is “under control,” the group will cotinue pushing each other to a mature gospel identity.
Lastly – accountability groups, even when successful, tend to show limited long-term success. Just because a behavior is brought under control doesn’t mean the underlying issue that caused it will not either cause other problems or cause the problem behavior to return. We could catalogue countless stories of guys who went through a group, found a measure of freedom, only to fall back into the same sin patterns (often, even worse).
Gospel-Centered Fight Clubs have a greater potential to have sticking power in a person’s life because the goal is not behavior modificaiton – its character transformation. A person who learns how to identify the sin under the sin gets adept at real repentance. A person who experiences how the gospel addresses their heart cries for security, acceptance, comfort and influence will also experience genuine freedom from their sinful compensating behaviors.
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